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there is something wrong with all of us. no one is perfect. everyone has skeletons in their closet and secrets, unless you’re like, christian xD sorry that was mean. but yes, no one is perfect.

the problem with me is that, i feel like nothing is ever really good enough for me. i will work so hard for something and get so far and once i have achieved it, it seems pointless because there is no where to go once i’ve completed my set goal.

for example: i won the Northern Territory heat for RAW comedy 2010 where i was immediately fast tracked to melbourne for the Melbourne International Comedy Festival.

the video can be seen here, im directly after Ronnie Cheng

once i had performed in melbourne and didnt win, i felt so empty. i told myself that i knew there was hardly any chance for me winning and i was there for the experience. but i still felt like i had achieved nothing, i came back to darwin completely empty handed.

its like as soon as im happy, i get sick of it and want to feel shit again.
its almost like i live off the feeling of being upset. its not that i like attention or being asked whats wrong, because i hate that. if im upset, i dont want to talk, i dont want you to understand, i just want to be alone.




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